Jokes: Page 102


Best Excuse


A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership and past the Tim Horton's.  Taking off down the Trans-Canada Hwy, he floored it to 120 kph, enjoying the wind blowing through his remaining hair.  "Amazing!" he thought as he flew down the highway, pushing harder on the gas pedal.  Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw the RCMP patrol car behind him, red and blue lights flashing and siren blaring.  "I can get away from him!"  thought the man as he watched the speed indicator move from 130 kph to 140, then 150 kph.  Suddenly, he thought, "What on earth am I doing? I'm too old for this nonsense!", pulled over to the side of the road and waited for the Mountie to catch up with him.  Pulling in behind him, the officer walked up to the driver's window, looked at his watch and said, "Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes. If you can give me a reason that I've never heard before for why you were driving so fast, I'll let you go."  The man, looking very seriously at the Mountie, said, "Years ago, my wife ran off with an RCMP officer. I thought you were bringing her back."